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Floppy where he is."Michael came down the steps and his mom pulled him up on her lap. "Now let's talk about Santa." You gonna try to tell me he's real?" Depends on what you mean by real. Am I going to tell you there is a big man in a red suit up at the North Pole with a bunch of elves making toys? No. But Santa is the spirit of giving without expecting anything in return. He's the essence of all that is good about Christmas. And as long as you keep him real in your heart, then the world will be a better place." I... guess so." Now look at Mr. Floppy. Think of all the joy and happiness he's brought you. Does he deserve to be thrown out just because he was paid for by your dad and me rather than made by Santa Claus?" No. I guess not." So let's get Mr. Floppy back to your room, and I'll make you some hot cocoa." Okay." Michael did as his mom asked, but despite her words, the world had lost just a bit of its magic.************May was pretending to be asleep in bed. She could hear her. Don’t even agree. Just play dead.Yes officer, I didn’t see the speed limit sign, I just didn’t see you!This group is compliments of Alan B.Still more hand-picked lousy humor...Why is a woman like a condom? Because both spend more time in your wallet than on your penis.My girlfriend’s dad asked me what I do. Apparently “Your daughter” wasn’t the right answer.What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker? A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.The teacher asked Jimmy, “Why is your cat at school today, Jimmy” Jimmy replied, crying, “Because I heard my dad tell my mom ‘I’m going to eat that pussy when Jimmy goes to school today’”“Babe, is it in?” “Yeah” Does it hurt?” “Yes” “Let me put it in slowly” “It still hurts” “Okay, let’s try another shoe size.”I asked a Chinese girl for her phone number, She said “Sex sex sex! Free sex tonight.” I said, “Wow” Then her friend said, “She means 666-3629”A husband came home with a half gallon of ice cream. He asked his wife if she.
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